What is Emotional Maturity and What is the Emotional Maturity Formula?
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What is the meaning of life, and how can you use emotional maturity to have better relationships and to not only survive but prosper
Q. Lewis, my wife always says I’m immature. That is what my two previous wives always said to me as well. Maybe they were onto something. I’m certainly not happy with myself. Any thoughts on the issue of maturity?
A. One of the reasons why a person may feel unhappy, discontented, and stuck with a life that seems to have no meaning is because they are emotionally immature.
What Does It Mean To Be Emotionally Immature?
An emotionally immature individual exhibits behavior that is appropriate to someone of a young age but not for the age of the person exhibiting this behavior.
What Does It Mean To Be Emotionally Mature?
Emotional maturity is the ability to respond to the environment, being aware of the correct time and location to behave, and knowing when to act, according to the circumstances and the culture of the society one lives in.
Aside from the unnecessary struggle and suffering that emotional immaturity can cause, it actually interferes with EEPPSA (effectiveness, efficiency, precision, productivity, and self-awareness) tools that are essential for personal development, self-improvement, and the actualization of human potential.
Signs of Emotionally Immaturity in an Adult Can Include:
- Making commitments and then failing to act on them.
- Fear of making a decision out of the belief that whatever decision they make is likely to be the wrong one.
- An unwillingness to be emotionally vulnerable.
- Being insensitive to the emotional vulnerability of others, even making others feel bad for feeling bad.
- An unwillingness to try new things.
- Insisting on getting the last word in a conversation especially where there is disagreement
- Never sure if what they are doing is good or bad and needing constant reassurance rom others.
- Not knowing what they want or what they need, and if they are given the means to know these things, they ignore or reject the information.
Signs of Emotional Maturity in an Adult Can Include:
- Being able to recognize and admit when you’re wrong.
- Being able to recognize and admit that you are biased.
- Recognizing and accepting your own feelings and needs.
- Recognizing that how you feeling need not define how you choose to act.
- Setting healthy boundaries.
- Pause between feeling and reacting.
- Love — expressed as compassion, empathy, and kindness
- Taking responsibility for your choices and action
- Composure, perseverance, and the ability to endure setbacks.
- Ability to surrender short-term gratification for long term benefit (self-control).
- Seeing the possibility of a positive outcome to any situation (Hope) no matter how dire it appears on the surface.
- Express gratitude. I do this as part of my daily “discipline”. In the morning, as part of my meditation, I pick three things I am grateful for. I repeat this exercise at night just before I go to sleep.
- Listen to others carefully as they express themselves. Withholding judgment, even if they tell you the world is flat or offer some seemingly irrational idea. Just listen carefully and hear what they are saying.
- Give up unnecessary regrets about the past and unnecessary expectations for the future. Especially internal conversations that repeat “If I had only done that.”
- Don’t take things personally
- Explore the distinction between what you want and what you really need.
Remember, Ego is a major cause of misery in the world. (That, and unrealistic expectations, especially around our control, assumptions, and change).
Maturity is a choice for everyone. The more you value who you are and what you have to offer, the more responsible you will be in taking care of yourself.”
As Albert Ellis says,
“The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president… You control your own destiny.”
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I also invite you to read, my regular blogs on game theory, and follow my posts and vlogs throughout the social network:
- YouTube: The “Asklewis Lewis Harrison” channel,
- Facebook Fan page: https://www.facebook.com/AskLewis/
- Group and Forum: “Lewis Harrison’s Applied Game Theory” https://www.facebook.com/groups/602287903244843/
- Twitter: @AskLewisH
- Podcast: An Introduction to Applied Game Theory – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4lzIPU0DSiU
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Sign up for our free daily newsletter. Click on the newsletter tab below. This will bring you to our master website at RealUGuru.com – Just look over to the right of the page and fill in your email address and join “The Lew Crew.” You get our regular, informative, motivational, inspirational, and factual, blogs, vlogs, newsletters. and discount coupons.
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Contact Information
Thanks for allowing me to share my knowledge with you. If you want to contact me, simply drop me an email…
LewisCoaches@ gmail.com
The Game Theory Gamer Research Team
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